Gloria: Do you know that 60 percent of all deaths in America are caused by guns?
Archie Bunker: Would it make you feel any better if dey was pushed out of windows?
Archie Bunker: Well, I'll tell you one thing about President Nixon. He keeps Pat home. Which was where Roosevelt should have kept Eleanor. Instead he let her run around loose until one day she discovered the colored. We never knew they were there. She told them they were gettin' the short end of the stick and we been having trouble ever since.
Mike: Let me tell you something Mr. Bunker…
Archie Bunker: No, let me tell you something, Mr. Stivic. You are a meathead! A meathead, dead from head up! A meathead!
Archie Bunker: When your mother-in-law and me was goin' around together, it was two years — we never — I never — I mean absolutely nothin', not 'til the wedding night.
Edith Bunker: Yeah, and even then…
Lionel Jefferson: But he's not a bad guy, Mr. Davis. I mean, like, he'd never burn a cross on your lawn.
Sammy Davis Jr.: No, but if he saw one burning, he's liable to toast a marshmallow on it.
Archie Bunker: Now, no prejudice intended, but I always check with the Bible on these here things. I think that, I mean if God had meant for us to be together he'd a put us together. But look what he done. He put you over in Africa, and put the rest of us in all the white countries.