DEAR ABBY: My wife and I lost our son to suicide a few years ago. We have never gotten over it. I have recovered somewhat and would like to resume having intimate relations, but she's not that far along.
I no longer feel there's any reason to continue on this earth. There is no point to my being here. I think about suicide daily. I have been told that if I were going to do this and hurt my family as my son did, I would've already done it.
My wife and I have been cast into a hell that's impossible to bear. There is no way to describe the pain, anger and sorrow we feel. I want to die because I feel the world would be a better place without my sorrowful self taking up resources. I have sought help ever since we lost my son, and have been taking all kinds of medication that I no longer want to take. Is there a way out other than my option? -- BEYOND DEPRESSED
DEAR BEYOND DEPRESSED: Please accept my deepest sympathy for the tragic loss of your son. I cannot imagine the hell you and your wife are going through.
Because you can't get the thought of suicide out of your mind, it is very important that you receive more help than I can give you in a letter. Your doctor should be put on notice about your issue with your medications.
Also, a group that might be helpful for you and your wife is the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. If you contact them, they can refer you to a local support group for people who are surviving a loved one's suicide. The website is afsp.org. If, however, you feel you have reached a point where harming yourself is imminent, I urge you to call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255. Please don't give up.
DEAR ABBY: I live in New England, where it is very gray during the winter. I was inspired by the bright colors of a local Mexican restaurant to redecorate my house. I feel happier with all the lovely colors, but my neighbors feel I am being culturally insensitive because I am not Mexican. I disagree. I think I'm being appreciative. What do you think? -- APPRECIATING IN NEW ENGLAND
DEAR APPRECIATING: I'm glad you asked. I think you have certain neighbors who should mind their own business and keep their criticism to themselves. I also think that you adopted the color scheme you did is a compliment.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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