In politics, absurdity is not a handicap. — Napoleon Bonaparte

All of the problems we fact today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of American Indians. — Pat Paulsen

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies. — Groucho Marx

Ninety-eight percent of adults in this country are decent, hard-working Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them. — Lily Tomlin

In politics it is necessary either to betray one’s country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate. — Charles de Gaulle

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn’t mean politics won’t take an interest in you. — Pericles

Politics is not the art of the possible. It’s the art of choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. — John Kenneth Galbraith

If you ever injected truth into politics, you’d have no politics. — Will Rogers

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles, the first of which is to be flexible at all times. — Senator Everett Dirksen

I have the most reliable friend in American politics, and that is ready money. — Phil Gramm

Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. — Tom Lehrer

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That clearly points to a political career. — George Bernard Shaw

A politician is a person with whose politics you don’t agree. If you agree with him, he is a statesman. — David Lloyd George

I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team. — Art Buchwald

A politician needs the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn’t happen. — Winston Churchill

The word “politics” is derived from the word “poly,” meaning “many,” and the word “ticks,” meaning “blood-sucking parasites.” — Larry Hardiman

Politics makes strange bedfellows rich. — Wayne Haisley

You can fool all of the people all of the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough. — Joseph Levine

When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. — PJ O’ Rourke

A politician is someone who will lay down your life for his country. — Texas Guinan

Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature. — Kin Hubbard

Although he is regularly asked to do so, God does not take sides in American politics. — George Mitchell

Bi-partisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. — George Carlin

By the time a man gets to be presidential material, he’s been bought ten times over. — Gore Vidal

We stand today at a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other leads to total extinction. Let us hope we have the wisdom to make the right choice. — Woody Allen

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